An Apple Tree Discovers Me

Or, "Malus Aforethought"!

I was riding home from work the other day, and noticed a cute little "Golden Delicious" (L. "Mater likum") sort of apple along the canal, and stopped to sample it. I figured, hey, even if I don't care for fully-ripened G. Delish, a semi-ripe one ought to be a at least a little bit tasty.



So I found a nice-looking example, polished off a bit of foggy bloom, and gave 'er a healthy bite.





My reaction is pretty clearly summed up in the following images . . . let me just add (in the hopes that it helps others avoid a similar fate) that taunting apples for being "too sweet" is never wise.

At first, it seemd like a fine idea.

After just a few more seconds, though, I became more and more aware that this apple, although it looked like some sort of wimpy Golden D., was in fact the Monarch Butterfly of the apple world -- without taking the time to perform a scientific study on the subject, I feel certain that the malic-acid content of this so-called "fruit" was in the high 90-percent range. There's no truth to the rumor that the pulp I spat out caused the majority of grasses within a two-foot radius to wither away -- but I *will* be staying at least two feet away from any pome that appears to come from this particular tree!